


The Perfect Costume

by SarcasticSmiler



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Gen, Halloween Costumes, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-31
Updated: 2016-10-31
Packaged: 2018-08-28 05:06:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8432920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SarcasticSmiler/pseuds/SarcasticSmiler
Summary: Kili tries to persuade Fili to wear the 'perfect' costume.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Just a little something I wrote at work yesterday after almost pissing myself with laughter when the image popped into my head while I was driving.

_25 th October_

“Please?”

“No.”

“Pretty please?”

“No.”

“Pretty please with a cherry on top?”

“No.”

“Pretty please with _me_ on top?”

“Still no, Kíli.”

“Oh come _on_ , it'll be _fun_ ,” Kíli tried, pouting.

“Not happening,” Fíli answered, casually turning the page in his book, blatantly ignoring his brother draping himself over the back of the sofa, arms curled around his shoulders as Kíli's long fingers toyed with his shirt buttons.

“But...”

“Nope.”

“Tauri, help me,” Kíli whined, pleading eyes fixing on his best friend, and their long suffering flatmate, sprawled over the arm chair, game controller in hand.

“You might as well agree, Fee,” she said, eyes not even flicking from the screen. “You know it'll happen anyway.”

“But why me?” Fíli groused, finally lowering his book.

“Because you're a muscly blond,” Tauriel shrugged.

“Because it's perfect for you!” Kíli added, nuzzling Fíli's bearded cheek.

“It's October, Kíli, I'll freeze,” Fíli tried to reason.

“I'll keep you warm,” Kíli purred only to yelp when a cushion flew into his face.

“Down boy,” Tauriel glared, “there’re rules about that kind of thing in the shared spaces.”

“Spoil sport,” Kíli grumbled.

“Mentally scarred,” Tauriel countered.

“You’re just jealous.”

“Am not!”

“Are too!”

“Am not!”

“Children!” Fíli interrupted, knowing the argument could go on for hours if he didn’t do something. “I’m not doing it, and that’s final!”

-x-

_31 st October_

The party was in full swing by the time they finally arrived, music blaring as monsters and angels, pirates and witches, and all manner of other creatures drank and laughed and danced the night away.

“Hey! Frank-n-Furter! Columbia!” Legolas called, tottering rather precariously towards them in his heels, dyed pigtails swinging almost wildly about.

“Harley Quinn!” Kíli grinned, even as Tauriel went to grab her drunk brother to stop him falling into them.

“Where’s your Poison Ivy?” she asked, looking for the short, bearded redhead that usually trailed him.

“Sulking somewhere that way,” he said, waving in the direction of the living room. “Hey, where’s your Rocky?”

“Coming,” Kíli said, his grin turning down right filthy as he looked over his shoulder to see Fíli making his way to them, his natural swagger hiding how uncomfortable he actually felt.

“Fucking hell,” Legolas blurted, mouth dropping open at the sight before him. “If I wasn’t stupidly in love with your cousin you’d have some serious competition on your hands.”

“Good to know.”

“How’d you do it?” Legolas asked, wide, slightly unfocused eyes taking in the lightly tanned skin, muscular body, and tight golden shorts that didn’t exactly leave much to the imagination.

“Let’s just say I can be rather persuasive,” Kíli said, slipping his arm around Fíli’s waist, fingers deliberately trailing over his side to make the blond shiver.

“Oh you dirty boy,” Legolas grinned.

“Or not,” Tauriel snorted. “He’s stuck doing the housework for the next two months.”

“Shut up, Tauri,” Kíli hissed.

“I need a drink,” Fíli grumbled, leaving the trio to weave his way to the kitchen.

“Jesus, it’s just as good walking away,” Legolas sighed.

“I know, right?” Kíli agreed, happily ogling his other half. He’d gladly do the dreaded housework if it mean getting to stare at _that_ for the entire night and know he’s the only one allowed to _touch_.


End file.
